On this Women's Day, I salute my
mother and all those other women who silently and selflessly work for the betterment
of their families, and in effect the society. In their endeavour to help their
spouses and kids, they often surrender their own identity. This, mind you, is
one of the biggest sacrifices made by countless women across the globe.
Having said that, I am often
reminded of a favourite topic from the 1980s and 1990s urban India: Women’s Lib.
A few days ago while again thinking
about that subject, some questions criss-crossed my mind. In the name of that
“liberation” (real or a derived one) are we actually losing out on something
bigger? Doesn’t that freedom also entail a strong sense of “responsibility”? What
about the larger consequences for the institutions of family and society?
These questions are tricky and their
answers manifold.
Actually social changes are so tedious
that sometime it takes decades before they even manifest themselves for better
or for worse. Therefore, the latent benefits of traditional values are neither
understood nor appreciated by most of us.
The “Hum do, humare do” (We two, ours two), or these days “We two ours,
one” family culture, together with the economic independence achieved by women
have added that strong sense of individualism to the modern society, especially
in the urban scenario. Thus, making modern women (and men) feel oppressed when sharing
home with their parents, in-laws or other elders of the family. These days, a
joint family may just include parents of either spouse or both. For instance,
in Mainland China, the government’s ‘One Child Policy’ has resulted in parents
of both spouses often sharing a home together!
In India, lack of presence of
elders at home is leading to depletion of age-old knowledge and wisdom among
youngsters that has conventionally been passed one generation to the next. As a
consequence, we have been very slow in realizing the value-based upbringing
that present day kids have been missing out. In fact, tradition is actually the
backbone that has kept our culture alive for centuries in the Indian family
system.
Interestingly, compared to several other
ancient civilizations, the Hindu civilization has managed to retain its
continuity over the past several millenia. According to Indian politician and
economist Subramanian Swamy, the Hindu civilization is among the 46 ancient
civilizations listed by the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural
Organization (UNESCO). While 45 other civilizations have disappeared, the Hindu
civilization is the only one that has survived. The traditional family system
has played a key role in helping Hindus retain their culture and tradition despite
800 years of Islamic rule and 200 years of Christian rule under the British East
India Company.
Some of us may like to argue
about availability of plenty of knowledge in other different modes; but I personally
feel that valuable time could be lost just trying to 'judge' the relevance of
that information.
The impact is being felt not only
in India, but most part of the globe. The Time
magazine’s recent cover story ‘I, Me & Myself’ makes for an interesting
read.
The young minds today are swayed
by popular media that essentially promotes this 'I, me and myself' culture, which
is neither good for individuals, families or the society; of course the same
isn't good for a nation too. It only serves to foster an increased sense of
greed and lack of empathy, which lead towards a highly materialistic yet empty
lifestyle, with possibly negative impact on both personal and professional
lives of individuals.
So is there is a real need for us
to revisit traditional value systems, including the joint family, as they may
have a hugely positive impact on youngsters. If such arrangement isn’t
feasible, we can make up for that through simple acts such as celebrating
festivals together or taking family vacations.
While letting go of that
'deceived sense of freedom', let us think of our children and their future so
that they learn the basic value of life such as ethics, love and sacrifice, ultimately,
learning to lead a contended and peaceful life.
It may sound somewhat primitive,
but it doesn’t take a lot to ponder over the benefits of imbibing centuries old
wisdom.
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