Don't glorify suicide; just glorify heroism

Glorifying the Suicide: It is tragic loss of life when ‪#‎PratyushaBanerjee‬ made a decision (or pushed into). However, she was responsible for it when other options were also available to her. Instead of fighting, she chose to flight...This is not a decision that can be rectified once made. Life is precious, god given and expected to make it meaningful. 

Friends and family knew (who are now talking on TV) are equally responsible along with her boyfriend as they could have provided better support system for her to get out of bad relationship. I wonder if the 'false ego' or 'extreme pride' makes a person inhumane that teaches to boost only success and avoid talking about issues/failures, then it is useless. We are failing to create the support system for our close friends and family to confide their fears, failure, issues in their lives. 

Respect the Life...this message would be more appropriate than glorifying the suicide. Otherwise, nonsense 24/7 senseless coverage would do more harm to the society than good to encourage a weak person to take such route. 

Although Hema Malini said correctly, "One must come out of odds & emerge successfully, not succumb under pressure. The world admire fighter, not loser", her last part was bit harsh as none knew the reality what a person went through to take such drastic decision. But, definitely she is right on - Be A Fighter.

Every person faces 'ups and downs' in life and we learn from public figure how they face the setbacks gracefully and emerge as winner. I remember Amitabh Bacchan's interview with Simi Garewal where he was talking about transition from superhero to character role and his life before 'kaun banega crorepati' and they way he narrated was so humbling, intense and inspiring. This teaches how successful people face the downfall and rise again in their life...

When we learn how to become successful, why we forget to learn how to face setbacks...

Fight, don't Flight...

#life #suicide #love #career #fight #inspiration #success 

Second Spring - review

Here is the review of Second Spring by Shweta Kesari 
The end was not how I supposed it to be,but it is the way it has to be.Authoress has done a great job while knitting the plot.Her straightforward views let readers think sharply and her candid note on life would let readers realize how things take a turn nowadays.But obvious, with a change in time,stories has changed, and also the way human reacts, but to know who is the one to hold your hand till eternity is the vital decision to lead a happy life. I quite appreciate the note this story ended on.The story succeeded in showing readers a new facet to life.Through the protagonist Avantika, authoress brings a message for readers that it is easy to flow in the whirlwind of emotion , but hard to take a wise decision at the proper time.
A book which has more than a story to serve to readers.

Rating : 4.1/5

Reviewer : Shweta Kesari

Second Spring

To read it further - /http://madhyapradesh.johntext.de/review-of-second-spring/

#sandhyajane #secondspring #book #bestseller #life #novel #contemporaryroamnce #poetry #new-release #lovestory #breakup #longing #loss #grief #inspiration #meaningoflife #unconditionallove #mustread #AnthonyDoerr #PaulaHawkins #JohnGrisham #NicholasSparks #Stephen King #DavidBaldacci #MarkGreaney #LaurenGroff 

#secondspring #spring #novel #breakup #book #contemporary #romance #India #nspirationalstory, #SandhyaJane #unconditionallove #motivation #meaningoflife #lovestory #lovelines #loneliness #longing #life  

Second Spring - Book Launch function in India

Here are some pictures of my book launch in India...

Second Spring

Shaina NC and I are talking about Second Spring

Shaina NC reading Second Spring

Signing Second Spring

Interview with media about Second Spring

Interview with media about Second Spring

Synopsis: 

This is Avantika’s heartfelt journey through love and life…

As a smart, successful, thirty-eight-year-old, single mother Avantika  seemingly has it all: a great career as a seasoned banking professional, respect and admiration from her peers as an able leader, fulfillment as a mother, and so many other things besides.

What is it then that drives her towards Rohan, a man six years her junior? He’s a man who ideally would not occupy much room in Avantika’s otherwise sorted mind space.

She has told herself she has no time for love.  Then, why does she make the choices she makes? Is it the sameness and banality of everyday existence? Is it the emotional vacuum? A need to relive life? A feeling that life as she is truly lived and felt is passing her by?

However, as she struggles with her feelings, Avantika and Rohan part ways… only to meet again. To what end? Why does Rohan want her back… and why now?

So many questions! Very few answers!

Avantika’s journey is as spiritual as it is emotional. Can love give second chances? Join Avantika in the twists and turns of her story, through her ponderings over the mysteries and vagaries of the word “love,” the complexities of human relationships, and the reassessment of all the values she has held dear…

#sandhyajane #secondspring #book #bestseller #life #novel #contemporaryroamnce #poetry #new-release #lovestory #breakup #longing #loss #grief #inspiration #meaningoflife #unconditionallove #mustread #AnthonyDoerr #PaulaHawkins #JohnGrisham #NicholasSparks #Stephen King #DavidBaldacci #MarkGreaney #LaurenGroff 

poem - inspired by 'A Second Spring'

मेरा होना तेरे होने का हासिल
तेरे होने में ही मुश्किल बड़ी है
तसव्वुर में ख़ुशी पाने की आदत
बड़ी बेकार ये आदत पड़ी है
जुदा वक्त ने तुझसे कर दिया,
पर हमारे बीच लम्हों की लड़ी है
ख्यालों में तुम्हारा अक्स जैसे
कोई उम्मीद आँखों में जड़ी है
हमारे और उसके दरमियाँ अब
ख़मोशी ही फ़क़त साझा कड़ी है

@nandita tiwari shared these beautiful lines for Avantika, a lead character in my novel....

she is currently reading my novel - A Second Spring...Brings New Hope

Dealing with "Break-up"...

After a break-up, dealing with the grief is one of the most complicated yet common problems among people in all age groups. 

Prolonged and untreated grief is becoming one of the major health issues in the modern society. Lead researcher Richard Bryant, a professor of psychology at the University of New South Wales in Sydney, Australia said, "Prolonged grief disorder is a big public health issue." Sometimes, prolonged grief and depression leads to inability to perform daily activities and, in worst cases, it can lead to death directly or indirectly. In extreme cases, this grief turns out be fatal. Recently, there was news about a couple, who were married for 73 years and died within 48 hours of each other. 

In Indian culture, with the loss of the joint family system as well as personal interaction with friends and family members, society is losing the strong emotional support system that once did wonders to bring the grieving person back into normal life. Thus, falling out of love and the grieving process have become more complicated.

Although professional counselling and therapy facilities are available, it is unreachable to most as it is either expensive or generic in nature.

Grief resulting from a break-up usually takes more recovery time compared to other emotional or financial loss (loss of home/job/friends...).

Check out some of the following grief-related symptoms:

- You dream or think of the person for more than half the time you are awake.

- You read or see your beloved's letters or pictures or in some form; you mostly remain in the past.

- You lose interest in other things or goals in life; for example, your career and food. At large in your life, everything looks meaningless

You must seek help if these symptoms start getting worse.... feeling numb, unable to trust others, or in the worst case, unable to perform daily activities. 

In most cases, you can develop your own fallback process by doing some of the following by yourself.

Initial process:

- Initially, talk to a trusted one about lost person, relationship, and memories. But, later, avoid talking about the person completely. 

Blank out:

- Avoid the person in all forms - personal interaction, visiting their accounts over the networking sites about updates, talking to common friends, reading their letters/mails, or checking out pictures.

- Take a regular walk: 

This is beneficial not only for your health, but also to cure depression, loneliness, and sadness

Life - Goal and Meaning:

- Start writing what are your goals in your life.

- Write your goals and add a timeline to it (write a book, attend school for a higher degree, or go trekking/camping, or develop a hobby).

These new activities not only keep you away from painful memories of the person, but also help you meet new friends to talk about yourself and your achievements. This is very important to bring back your lost self-esteem if you have faced rejection.

- Review your goal with someone senior, a trusted person, or validate it by carrying out in-depth research.

- One rejection won't make you worth less; in-fact, you should go beyond that "idiot's" imagination and show "who is the loser."

Worth of the person: 

- Write down all the people in your life who helped you through thick and thin and compare if "the lost person" did anything close to your expectations.

Count your blessings: 

- Meet people who are less fortunate and help them. There is no joy bigger than seeing a smile on another's face because of you. Go and visit plenty of such places and spend time in bringing some smiles on less fortunate ones...that happiness will help you restore your lost "self-worth," if any. 

Accept your Life:

-  Believe that there is always better waiting for you. This is a belief of "some way God is protecting you" and wanting to give you more or better... Gita says, "Whatever happens, happens for good." It works.

Accept your Destiny:

- Above all, trust you destiny. This simple thought will help you cope with your loss. This teaches you to "accept life as it comes." Scientifically, when you are dealing with grief, the process will start from rejection, anger, negotiation, and acceptance. Hindu philosophy has nicely described this in Gita to live a satisfied life by accepting destiny. Life, without someone, is never incomplete. It is always you who decides how to complete and complement with or without a person.

When you focus on your life and life-goals, your "loss" eventually seems too immaterial to care about. You will find inspiring goals and the thoughts of achieving those goals will give you a "kick" to your brain.

No person in your life is larger than "you." For you and your life, ONLY you will matter eventually.

Please remember that everyone takes different time to heal, depending on the relationship, involvement, and grieving person's emotional status. 

Another important suggestions is - don't break-up over silly reasons because - 

"No one is perfect and no relationship is flawless." 

You will end up wasting time in finding the new "right partner" and establishing the relationship every time...life is too short for this.

Treating equal pain and pleasure, gain and loss, victory and defeat, thus engage yourself in the battle and you will incur no sin.

Or

Battle for the sake of battle.

Loss does not depress, Victory does not exhilarate… 

and a new battle begins in the life ...

(Ref:
1. Bhagavad Gita 

2. http://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief-loss/coping-with-grief-and-loss.htm

3. http://www.helpguide.org/articles/family-divorce/coping-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm)

#breakup #heartbreak #love #life #sandhyajane

© Copyright 2012-14 Sandhya Jane

Valentines Day

#romance #life #love #valentineday #valentine #sandhya #Jane #sandhyajane
© Copyright 2012-14 Sandhya Jane